I’m not sure why, but it feels as if a great load has lifted from me today. Perhaps an accumulation of things; driving, pre-dawn, up Mount Donna Buang, out of the blanket of cloud and into the luminous world of mountain islands in an endless sea of white. And what happened in co-becoming zoom class last night, where we spoke of, then entered, the pattern. Just three of us who’ve been working together for a long time, as most couldn’t make it last night. I’ve never run such a small group, but the potency was sweet. It feels that the accumulation of co-becoming practice is bearing fruit. It feels like I’m doing the real work, with wonderful people.
My dear friend Andrew has made this lovely image out of my words and photo of Kurrunganner, seen from Donna Buang, words written long ago, when I first experienced the power of the gaze returned. This way of presenting the work feels true to the gift that it is, so I’m grateful.
Since that gaze years ago, I’ve done my best to be loyal to what it conveyed, to get out of the way, and be of service to more-than-human voices, but depression breeds self-consciousness. These are difficult times, and I’m genetically and dispositionally predisposed to this illness, and while there’s less stigma attached to the condition these days, it’s still hard to admit its occasional dominance of my life. The utter delight, then, of today, and the rise out of the fog!
Co-becoming is an ancient, timeless practice that I have committed to facilitating, yet I’ve always felt self-conscious, inviting people to experience this work. But today, with sunniness inside, it’s easier. This work feels the most useful thing I can offer at this stage in my life, it is the closest to my heart – and it helps me too, lifting me out of heaviness and stuckness. I want to be of use to others, human and more than, so if this speaks to you, feel free to reach out.